Stress is one of those words we throw around all the time — and let’s be honest, most of us are feeling it daily. But behind that feeling is a complex chain reaction in your body. Hormones, your nervous system, digestion, sleep, energy — stress touches it all.

“Hormones, your nervous system, digestion, sleep, energy — stress touches it all.”

And no, the goal isn’t to eliminate stress entirely. Unless you’ve found a portal to another planet, stress is part of life, especially when life is fast, full, and always online. Our systems weren’t built for constant stimulation, so it’s no surprise many of us feel overwhelmed.

The truth is, some stress is actually helpful (and normal). It motivates us, helps us adapt, and supports important processes in the body — like metabolism, healing, and immune defense. It’s when stress becomes constant and unrelenting that it begins to take a toll.

So let’s talk about what stress actually does inside your body, how cortisol fits in, and what it looks like to support your system in a way that works for real life.

What is cortisol and why does it matter?

Cortisol is a hot topic, and unfairly labeled the bad guy when it comes to stress, hormone health, and weight gain. The truth? It’s not something you want to eliminate. It’s a hormone your body needs. It’s produced by your adrenal glands — those two small triangle-shaped glands sitting above your kidneys — and helps regulate stressful experiences, energy, metabolism, blood sugar, inflammation, and more.

“Cortisol is a hot topic, and unfairly labeled the bad guy when it comes to stress, hormone health, and weight gain. The truth? It’s not something you want to eliminate.”

But cortisol doesn’t work in isolation. It’s one player in what I often call the hormone symphony. More than 50 hormones are working in concert every day to keep your body functioning. That includes hormones from your brain, thyroid, gut, pancreas, adrenal glands, and reproductive organs. They’re in constant communication — sending signals, adjusting, responding. And when one hormone tries to take over the show and drown out the rest, the harmony breaks down. That’s exactly what happens when you’re under chronic stress — your cortisol level stays elevated, and the whole system starts to fall out of sync. The whole symphony starts to sound off-key, and symptoms show up.

So, why does cortisol want to take over? It’s because the body feels as though it’s in a constant state of alertness. Cortisol is part of your body’s natural alarm system — kicking off the “fight or flight” response so you can act fast in the face of a threat. The problem is, modern life is full of stressors that your body treats like emergencies. An overflowing inbox, a news headline, a hard conversation — all of it can register as danger.

That means cortisol stays elevated longer than it’s meant to. And when that happens over and over again? That’s when stress becomes chronic — and starts to take a toll.

What happens when cortisol gets out of rhythm?

Cortisol naturally follows a circadian rhythm: it’s supposed to rise in the morning to help you wake up and feel alert, then taper off as the day goes on so you can wind down and sleep.

But when stress becomes chronic, that rhythm falls apart. You might feel:

  • Wired at night but exhausted during the day
  • Anxious, edgy, or foggy
  • More prone to colds and feeling run down
  • Disconnected from your menstrual cycle or struggling with hormone shifts

“Sometimes, your body produces too much cortisol. Other times, it gets so worn out that it doesn’t produce enough.”

Sometimes, your body produces too much cortisol. Other times, it gets so worn out that it doesn’t produce enough. We call this Hypothalamus-Pituitary-Adrenal (HPA) axis dysfunction, and it’s one of the most common patterns I see in women who are burned out but still pushing through.

It’s important to note that just because you’re stressed doesn’t mean you have too much cortisol all the time. Your cortisol levels can be too low or too high — and either extreme can create problems like low energy, poor sleep, or even weight issues. When tackling stress, testing cortisol levels can be a helpful step you can take along with talking through your daily experience, mood, and symptoms with your doctor. These are a few ways to help create a personalized plan that works for your body.

Why women feel stress differently

Women tend to carry a lot — mentally, emotionally, and physically. And because reproductive hormones are deeply interconnected with cortisol, stress can create a powerful ripple effect.

“Because reproductive hormones are deeply interconnected with cortisol, stress can create a powerful ripple effect.”

When your body prioritizes survival over reproduction, hormone production gets rerouted. That’s why stress can impact everything from your period and fertility to thyroid health, libido, and bone density. Even just thinking about fertility, navigating a life transition, or trying to conceive can shift your hormonal balance. Stress doesn’t just influence how you feel — it can shape what options feel accessible in that season of life.

I often work with patients who are “doing everything right” but still feel off. Often, the missing piece is thinking about the adrenal glands — their ability to produce the right hormones at the right time has been worn down by long-term stress.

Let’s talk about caffeine…

Caffeine can raise cortisol levels, especially if you drink a lot, drink it late, or are particularly sensitive to it. But not everyone responds the same way. Your genes, your stress levels, and your timing all matter.

I’m not here to vilify caffeine. I love a latte with a heart made of foam. But I do recommend noticing how it affects your energy, your mood, and your sleep. Your body will tell you what works and what doesn’t.

The gut-brain connection

Your gut and your brain are in constant communication through something called the gut-brain axis. Stress can change your digestion, disrupt your gut microbiome, and even lead to symptoms like bloating, gas, nausea, or bowel changes. I see it all the time. Patients with “nervous stomachs” who feel stress in their bellies.

The good news? Supporting your gut can support your brain where those hormone signals are made (and vice versa).

What about the vagus nerve?

The vagus nerve is one of the most powerful regulators of your stress response. It’s a massive, bi-directional highway that helps your brain talk to your organs and helps your body say, “We’re safe now.”

When we activate the vagus nerve, we help the body move into parasympathetic mode — the “rest and digest” state where healing can happen. You can support it through things like deep breathing, humming or singing, gentle movement, and even meditation.

Stress isn’t always bad (and how to move through it)

Not all stress is harmful. There’s a kind called eustress — the kind that motivates you to show up, stretch outside your comfort zone, or rise to a challenge. The goal isn’t to eliminate stress entirely, it’s to learn how to move through it and recover. Here are some of my best tips on how to do just that:

  • Prioritize quality sleep. Restore your natural cortisol rhythm by going to bed and waking up at consistent times.
  • Wake up and step outside. Let natural morning sunlight fill your eyes, touch your skin, and breathe in the outdoor air.
  • Take short, grounding walks in nature or barefoot outside to help your nervous system reset.
  • Practice deep, slow breathing — especially box breathing or the 4-7-8 breath.
  • Incorporate gentle movement like yoga, stretching, or dancing into your day. 
  • Laugh, connect, and spend time with people who make you feel safe and supported.
  • Set clear boundaries with your time, technology, and emotional energy.
  • Journal or process emotions through creative outlets to complete the stress cycle.

The key is closing the stress loop. Let the body ramp up when it needs to, but make sure it knows how to come back down. That’s where healing happens.

What I personally practice (and recommend)

Morning and evening rituals

I keep it simple. Sunlight in the morning. Wind-down time at night. Consistency over perfection. Supporting your circadian rhythm helps a lot with the balance of your hormone production.

“Downward-facing phone”

I try not to flood my system with input. Social media, the news, and even unread texts can keep our stress response in the “on” position, whether we’re consciously aware of it or not. So I flip the phone over and give my nervous system a break.

Breathwork and movement

Even five minutes makes a difference. A few slow belly breaths. A grounding walk. Gentle movement that brings you back to yourself can help regulate your system. And don’t underestimate a slower-paced style of movement. Sometimes the harder we push, the more stress we pile on.

Protect your sleep

Sleep is when your body heals. Cortisol and melatonin work on opposite rhythms. Mess with one, and you’ll feel it everywhere.

Joy and connection

Time with my husband, my son, my dog, my people. A favorite playlist. It all counts. Remember, all the things that stress you out? They’re not the point—they’re just the means. The real goal is to enjoy your life and be present with the people you love.

Boundaries

This one is big. Boundaries with work. Boundaries with tech. Boundaries with my own expectations. As they say, protect your peace.

Stress isn’t just a mental state. It lives in your body. In your breath. In your digestion. In your hormonal rhythms. But it’s not the enemy — stress is your body trying to protect you.

“It’s not the enemy — stress is your body trying to protect you.”

The work is learning how to respond with care. Not to push harder, but to pause, listen, and recalibrate.

You don’t need a perfect routine to regulate your cortisol levels. Just start where you are. One breath. One boundary. One small moment of rest.

That’s how we build resilience. That’s how we heal.

Dr. Jaclyn Tolentino is a Board-Certified Family Physician and the Lead Functional Medicine Physician at Love.Life. Specializing in women’s health and hormone optimization, she has been featured in Vogue, The Wall Street Journal, and Women’s Health. As a functional practitioner and a breast cancer survivor, Dr. Tolentino is dedicated to uncovering the root causes of health challenges, employing a holistic, whole-person approach to empower lasting wellbeing. Follow her on Instagram here for more insights.