It would be nearly impossible to quantify the amount of articles and advice that I consumed when we first became parents. I searched for everything from newborn sleep to developmental activities, seeking answers that often only created more questions. Floods of information washed over me without leaving much that stuck. What did stick? A short mantra that a friend shared. 

“I searched for everything from newborn sleep to developmental activities, seeking answers that often only created more questions.”

“Nothing is permanent.”

It was so simple, yet it applied to everything. Victorious nap in the crib? Enjoy it without setting the expectation that it will be this smooth next time. Nothing is permanent. Horrible afternoon with nonstop tears? Get through it one moment at a time. Nothing is permanent.

I still use that mantra to keep myself present with my kids, both in times of gratitude and times of survival. Over the years, I’ve cultivated and collected other mantras that quickly recenter me in specific scenarios. Their brevity is their strength. I can reach for them in a moment without fumbling for elaborate parenting formulas. The truth of these words persists from pregnancy through empty nesting, shifting to match each new season we’re in.  

Do you have a mantra that you hold onto as a parent? Please share it in the comments if you’d like! 

For mornings (or anytime throughout the day):

  1. Nothing is permanent.
  2. I can learn and lead at the same time. 
  3. My voice is becoming my child’s inner voice. 
  4. The sound of my child waking up is cause for joy. 
  5. Even the monotonous moments are once-in-a-lifetime.
  6. I cannot control the future, but I can meet its challenges. 
  7. I am the best parent for my children, and they are a gift to me. 
  8. Today is an experience to enjoy, not a performance to execute. 
  9. I have been trusted with the care of this specific child for a reason. 
  10. I am trustworthy and capable of making good decisions for my children.
  11. I am confident in how well I know my child, and I remain curious as they grow. 

For moments of overstimulation:

  1. Let them be little.
  2. This is the sign of a full life.
  3. This is just a sensation. I am safe. 
  4. There is chaos around me, not inside me.
  5. I do not need to react at this moment. First, breathe. 
  6. Messes happen, they are part of a happy childhood. 
  7. I am allowed to set boundaries to protect my time and energy.
  8. My child is making a (loud and/or repetitive) noise. I can remain calm. 
  9. Calm is coming, embrace the beauty behind the overwhelm right now. 
  10. When I am needed in more than one place, I can prioritize without guilt. 

For when it feels like it’s going too fast:

  1. I did not blink and miss anything, I was here.  
  2. As long as I am alive, there is still time to love. 
  3. I can choose to be satisfied with the days I have. 
  4. Nostalgia is a gift. It’s a privilege to have memories to miss. 
  5. Each moment that passes is not lost, they live inside me forever.
  6. This moment matters just as much as my future moments of reflection. 
  7. I slow time down by soaking in the present. Fretting takes me to the future.
  8. Just because I know it’ll be over someday does not mean I have to dwell on that. 
  9. I cherish memories of my child while remaining most committed to loving the present version of them. 

For times that you feel embarrassed:

  1. There is no such thing as normal.
  2. I can either learn from this or laugh at this. 
  3. I do not owe the world an explanation for this moment. 
  4. My child is learning, and so am I. There’s no shame in that. 
  5. This moment is not a reflection of the big picture of my parenting.
  6. What strangers think of me does not matter, how I make my child feel does. 
  7. Connecting the way my child needs is more important than appearing impressive. 

For when you’re about to have a big event:

  1. I will be present to enjoy this moment.
  2. I anticipate and welcome the unexpected.
  3. I deserve to pause and savor how far we’ve come. 
  4. The work I (or my child) have put into this is enough. 
  5. My body is a worthy vessel for memories even if I miss a photo. 
  6. It is not my job to control the way my child experiences this day. 
  7. My worth as a mom is not dependent on the outcome of this day. 
  8. I will not allow duties to distract me from connecting with my child. 

For when you feel like you messed up:

  1. There’s no such thing as a perfect parent. 
  2. I can start fresh right now. I don’t have to wait.
  3. I am accountable for my actions, not my feelings. 
  4. No single moment will define our journey together. 
  5. This is an opportunity to teach my children about repair. 
  6. My child doesn’t need my perfection, they need my presence. 
  7. I honor my strengths and acknowledge my areas for growth with compassion.
  8. This feeling is simply a message to myself that I want to do it differently next time. 
  9. The grace I show myself will be the first template for how my children treat themselves. 

For quieting the voice of comparison:

  1. I am enough, just as I am. 
  2. We are all trying our best. 
  3. I do not know the whole story.
  4. Parenting is not a competition. 
  5. Someone else’s strengths do not diminish ours. 
  6. I release the need to compare myself to others. 
  7. It’s a positive thing for my child to witness differences. 
  8. I will assume positive intent until I’m shown otherwise. 
  9. I will not compare my private shadows to their public shine. 

For times when you need to take care of yourself:

  1. I cannot pour from an empty cup.
  2. It is not selfish to take time for myself. 
  3. Shame has no place in my home or my body. 
  4. My needs are important and worthy of attention. 
  5. I am worthy of success and fulfillment in all areas of my life.
  6. Discovering new passions only adds to my depth as a parent.
  7. I am investing in the inheritance of a joyful parent for my children.
  8. Moments of joyful reunion can be better for us than unenthusiastic presence. 
  9. Parenting is an important part of my identity, but other parts of me deserve care too.

For times when the world feels scary:

  1. Be here now.
  2. My calm is contagious.
  3. Just do the next right thing. 
  4. This is out of my hands, but I am ok. 
  5. Struggle and pain are valuable teachers. 
  6. Nothing can steal my courage and kindness. 
  7. I am safe in my body, my child is safe in theirs.
  8. I will not allow despair to define their childhood.  
  9. My example is creating the lens with which my child views challenges. 
  10. I cannot give my child a perfect world, but I can work to make it better. 

For when you need to let go of an expectation:

  1. My ultimate goal in connection, not control. 
  2. My child is good inside and I am good inside. 
  3. My child came through me, but they are not me.
  4. Just because it looks different doesn’t mean it’s inferior. 
  5. I am committed to the process and I release the outcome. 
  6. This life is beautiful even when the path isn’t what I chose. 
  7. I release the need to control every outcome and trust in the flow of life.

For the end of the day:

  1. I’m doing a really good job.
  2. I love this life that I’ve created.
  3. My children are safe and loved. 
  4. I have done enough. I deserve rest.
  5. There can be hard moments on great days. 
  6. I release this day and I start fresh tomorrow.
  7. I trust that I am exactly where I need to be on my journey.
  8. I honor my journey as a parent, and all that I have accomplished.
  9. I am proud of the love and nurturing I provided for my family today. 
  10. I rest knowing that I am capable of meeting whatever comes tomorrow. 

Ellie Hughes is a Contributing Editor at The Good Trade. She spent several years as a sustainable fashion blogger and leading the marketing for brands aiming to operate with ethics and the environment as their priority. She is now a freelance writer and marketing consultant living in Portland with her husband, two young daughters, and corgi.